Just Smile and Nod

I sat up straight in my seat while twiddling my thumbs in my lap, and I glanced around the bagel café as I waited for the manager to finish jotting down notes. She was a nice, middle-aged white lady; perhaps a little too nice, because this interview was going too well. So far, I only had to answer, “What were your duties at Pippin,” and “What are your hobbies?”

“Can you tell me about a time that you really impressed a customer?” she asked next.

“Sure,” I said. “One time while working at Pippin, I was cleaning tables, there was this one mom with her five year old son, because, sometimes, parents just like to bring their kids to the school’s dining cafeteria. Anyway, I overheard her struggling with her math homework, and her mom didn’t know what to do. So, while still cleaning the table, I offered the child tips that helped her understand and get to the solution. The mom was very happy.”

“Wow, that’s very impressive!”

I smiled and nodded.

“Now, as you might’ve noticed, our bagel café’s hours run from 5 A.M. in the morning until 4 P.M. Do you think you can perform at your best when you’re coming in at 4 A.M. to open up the store?”

“Yeah, of course! Back in high school, I was on the swim team all four years, and we had practices every day in the cold winter at 5 A.M. And every now and then, I still wake up really early to go swimming once my school gym opens. I’m really used to sleeping early and waking up early.”

“Wow, high school swim team—very impressive!”

I smiled and nodded.

“Alright, well, your hair is combed, and you look clean and neat. I think we can schedule you for an eight-hour training shift some time this week.”

Seventy-two dollars. New shoes. Fuck yes.

“I need to go check up on something in the back, so I’m going to have my assistant come out here to finish up your interview, ok?”

I smiled and nodded.

The manager got up and headed back into the kitchen, and after a minute, out came this gruff looking Mexican (non-racist) guy. He sat down in front of me.

“You Brian? I’m Ray.” He flipped through the manager’s notes for a few seconds, and then he asked me, “So what motivated you to apply for our bagel café?”

Shit, I thought I was done with this interview? Why is he asking me new questions? “Well, I really like working with food service,” I answered.

“So why not McDonald’s or Burger King?”

“Because...I like working with healthy and fresh food.”

“So why not the Cornerstore Bakery on the other side of the plaza?”

My scalp started to itch a little. “Because...The hours of your store fit into my schedule really well.”

“The Cornerstore Bakery opens around the same time and closes later than our store. I’m sure you could’ve gotten the same hours over there, plus more.”

“Well, I just really like bagels.”

“So you’re trying to get a job here for the free bagels?”

My scalp was really itchy now. “I just...will be a great asset to your team here. I believe my qualities...” I started to trail off, “...are really valuable, and uh, strong work ethic, and integral—integrity, charisma...”

I smiled and nodded. I WOKE UP AT 3 AM EVERY DAY DURING HIGH SCHOOL FOR SWIM PRACTICE, I wanted to tell him, but I was probably too far downhill by now.

---
“WAKE UP!”
Written March 2nd, 2006

So it took me five hours of sleep total within the last two days and over ten consecutive D's and F's on my history tests to finally realize that I've been at academic nadir for the last two months.

Something I used to do is sleeping early at night and waking up early to do homework. That worked all of first semester—I went to bed by ten and was up at five finishing my homework that I was too lazy to do the night before. But something just went wrong the second semester. I would plan to go to sleep by ten but end up in bed some time after midnight, and the next morning, when my cell phone would wake me up at 4:30, I would decide to add just another half hour. When it rang again at 5, I figured it wouldn't be too bad if I just added another half hour. And then 15 minutes. And then another 15 minutes. Ten minutes. Five minutes. Aw damn it, gotta shower, eat, pack my stuff and go off to school.

I don't get homework done anymore. The last chapter we did in math, I did not turn in six of the assignments; I had planned on waking up at four the day they were all due, and well, the whole process I described above happened. When I don't get my history and chemistry homework done, I go to my brother's old sophomore year folder and dig out the necessary assignments from there. I haven't even read the last fucking ten chapters in History, which pretty much explains all my low scores.

And my sleeping habits. K, I lied about getting a total of five hours of sleep within the last two days. Change that to seven hours, because I know I've slept for entire classes during the last two days.

As much I would love staying in San Jose and going to Oakridge every other day after I graduate high school, I still want to get into a UC. I need to totally revamp my habits and get the fuck back on track before I kill my grades and before my mom kills me.
---

I’ve never been in such better health than I was these past two years in college because of all the sleep I got. (Yes, for lazy humanities majors with barely any classes, college equals more sleep than high school.) I was sick all the time in high school, but this past winter quarter, I went the entire quarter without getting sick (well, the eight weeks of diarrhea probably made up for not getting sick, but that’s for another flashback).

I still haven’t gotten a call back from the bagel store, but after much consideration, I realized that even if I was offered the job, I wouldn’t take it. There’d be no way that I could handle the hours. If I got this job, I’d probably end up living my high school days again, and I’d probably die. Ok, that concludes my defense mechanism.

I really would’ve liked a new pair of shoes. Damn it.